Tuesday Blog

I try to keep KDDR's suggestions in mind. My expression, written and oral suck ass. When talking to people I am trying to keep in mind not to talk so fast. But I still do it; I am still not able to control the speed and clarity of my speech most of the time. Whenever I remember to do it, I control the speed of speech for a little while, but then I go back to my old ways.

I am still delusional about a lot of things; my mind seems to be disconnected from reality. I see things in a way my mind fits beneficial to me or doesn't cause me much pain, even though in the long term, the pain is inescapable. I also just worry about the short term, and assume that things will take care of themselves in the long term.

Changing subjects, I came to know that my co-worker fucked me over today, it was quite a shock, I did not expect it. I now need to be much more careful. My new boss is already giving me a lot of headache, and now this guy has added fuel to the fire. I need to be more careful about what I say and the way I act at work. There are too many people walking around with not enough to do. I have gotten into trouble earlier for talking too much at work. Now my coworker told on me that I have been coming in late. Even though work is getting done and we are making lot of progress in the project, he felt the need to tell on me. When I told him he should have come to me first, he said that I was right and that he should have come to first before ratting me out like that.

This has really upset me today, when I came to know that he back stabbed me. It now kills the team morale, when you know one of the members cannot be trusted. I guess I have to keep it strictly professional with this fuck from now on.